Real Security is a Process

Real Security is a Process
by Eve Ensler

[Listen to Audio! ]

Why are we suddenly a nation and a people who strive for security above all else? In fact, security is essentially elusive, impossible. We all die. We all get sick. We all get old. People leave us. People surprise us. People change us. Nothing is secure. And this is the good news. But only if you are not seeking security as the point of your life.

Here’s what happens when security becomes the center of your life. You can’t travel very far or venture too far outside a certain circle. You can’t allow too many conflicting ideas into your mind at one time as they might confuse you or challenge you. You can’t open yourself to new experiences, new people, and new ways of doing things. They might take you off course. You cling desperately to your identity. […]

Of course now you can no longer feel what another person feels because that might shatter your heart, confuse your basic thinking, destroy the whole structure. Ideas get shorter -- they become sound bites. There are evildoers and saviours. Criminals and victims. Those who are not with us are against us. It gets easier to hurt people because you do not feel what’s inside them. […]

But all of this offers only a false sense of security. Real security means contemplating death, not pretending it doesn’t exist. It means not running from loss, but feeling it, surrendering to sorrow, entering grief.

Real security is not knowing something when you don’t know it.

Real security cannot be bought or arranged or accomplished with bombs. It is deeper. It is a process. It is the acute awareness that we are all utterly interdependent and that one action by one being in one town has consequences everywhere.

Real security is the ability to tolerate mystery, complexity, ambiguity -- indeed hungering for these things.

--Eve Ensler

21 ways to celebrate life

21 Ways To Celebrate Life

--posted by JZ on May 21, 2008

After Nancy Rothstein's son, Josh, passed away unexpectedly, she was seeking a way to offer a tribute for family and friends to honor his birthday. With each passing birthday, she adds one more item to the list.

Last April 16 would've been Josh's 21st birthday, and true to her tradition, Nancy shared these 21 ways to celebrate life:

1. Smile. Smiling makes you and those around you feel good. If you don’t feel good, a smile can trick your brain into feeling better.
   
   
2. Eat ice cream.
   
   
3. Run on the beach. If you can’t physically do this, use your imagination.
   
   
4. Call someone who is ill or lonely. Listen to their story. Take the time. Tell them your story, if they ask.
   
   
5. Listen to music that touches your heart and soul.
   
   
6. Sing in the shower, or out loud if you are comfortable.
   
   
7. Visit the grave of a loved one and celebrate your continued BREATH. And tell your loved one what’s on your mind.
   
   
8. Play with a dog.
   
   
9. Thank yourself for putting up with all the things about yourself that drive you nuts! Activate your sense of humor!
   
   
10. Apologize to someone you have wronged in any way.
    
    
11. Take a day, or even a few hours, “off” to do something you always want to do but never take the time to do.
    
    
12. Eat something you never indulge in (unless allergic!) and savor every bite….slowly. No guilt permitted!
    
    
13. Re-watch your favorite funny or happy movie in your most comfortable clothes.
    
    
14. Make plans with 2 friends that you are crazy about but never see…near or far away.
    
    
15. Go outdoors to a natural setting. Sit. Close your eyes. Listen to the world. It’s all an extension of you! Your breath connects you intrinsically to the world.
    
    
16. Laugh. Do something fun or silly that evokes laughter. It has been said that laughter is God’s sunshine.
    
    
17. Place this list in an envelope and revisit it periodically to see how you are celebrating YOURSELF! If you are good to yourself, you can be much better to those around you.
    
    
18. Go to your heart and make all your decisions from there; and all will be well.
    
    
19. Follow the path that matters.
    
    
20. Believe and feel the change you want to see and you will BE the change you envision.
    
    
21. ....Yet you must know that in the end, it is LOVE’s garden you must tend.

Give

"Give, give, give -- what is the point of having experience, knowledge or talent if I don't give it away? Of having stories if I don't tell them to others? Of having wealth if I don't share it? I don't intend to be cremated with any of it! It is in giving that I connect with others, with the world and with the divine." --Isabel Allende

Giving

Think of giving not as a duty but as a privilege. --John D. Rockefeller Jr.

Vision

The vision must be followed by the venture. It is not enough to stare up the steps -- we must step up the stairs. --Vance Havner